JOE: Hardees has really good breakfast... my dad used to take me there for breakfast... before funerals.
JOE: You should buy one of 'em and ride your horse to work.
ANNA: You get a ticket if your dog shits on the ground. I can't imagine what they'd do if a horse did...
JOE: Put a diaper on your horse!
JOE: You can buy deodorant for your horse!
KATIE: Well aren't you special...
JOE: Only when it's cold.
Note: In high school, Joe had a girlfriend for 9 months - but he never kissed her.
ROD: On purpose?
JOE: No... I don't think I was ever attracted to her.
JOE: Yeah... then I found out that she cheated on me...
KATIE: Joe, how can someone cheat on you if you've never even kissed her? What'd she do, walk down the hall with another boy?
JOE: Now, if you were under the influence... you might be laughing...
JAMES: Under the influence of what?
JOE: Ethanol.
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